ethereal.cc
Old wounds
from the proverbial-salt department.
written by alan on September 10, 2002

Music: Coldplay - Shiver / In My Place / The Scientist

Jenn spoke to me again today. Its about bloody time. Ever since the little incident it's been eating me inside...i'd think about talking to her again a few times a day. I dunno what it is...maybe i'm just nuts for wanting her. Could this be the same as the deal i had with amamda? For those who don't know, a few years ago I came into meeting this woman named amanda. She had apparently been introduced to wes by a mutual 3rd party and had started to form a relationship. Now, being as close to wes as I am, it was only a matter of time before I got closer to her. After she broke up with wes (a week later, i might add), she proceeded to get with another couple guys in my then 'circle of friends'. All the while I had grown attached to her...she was more computer-savvy than any of the other women I knew at the time...plus she was quite attractive. However, being as naive as i was, I mistook her so-called 'friendship' as something a little more. In her eyes, I ws just a toy...someone to take advantage of....and that she did for an entire summer. I'd do anything for her. I drove her around...did countless favours...and recieved nothing in return.

It was at this point that I had reached my lowest...my depression over this was quite bad, tho not as bad as it has been recently. It took me a while to see her for what she really was...another of the many self-centered, shallow women who's only joy in life is to make men suffer (in various ways) while taking them for all they're worth. I got over her eventually. It was a very long time doing, but i'm past that. So we come to the present situation...and i ask myself, is this the same? Or is this something more? I wish there was a way to know for certain. Unfortunately, this is another of life's 'things'. Its always uncertain. *sigh*

In other news, It looks like i'll be heading across the border again soon to see Underworld live at Clutch Cargo's in Pontiac, MI. I have immense respect for this electronic group as they have created many classic electronic music 'staples' (including the ever-popular 'born slippy'). I can't wait to see these guys. It guarantees not to disappoint.

Cert exam on friday...i hope i get this one...its harder to study for than usual.


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