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The Feast Of...
from the day-of-birth department.
written by alan on December 16, 2002

Music: Marumari - Supermogadon (album) / Lustmord - Metavoid (album)

My 23rd birthday has passed...two days ago, to be exact. One would expect this day to be among the better ones in a person's life, if not the only good one. Not so for me...at least not this time. Right from the get-go i was feeling pretty depressed. I, of course, chose to hide this feeling for most of the day. I dodn;t need to bring everyone else down with me, although i'm sure a couple of the people I was around had noticed something.

The day started off alright, i guess. I woke up much too early after having a late night prior, so that was kinda crappy. I began by lying in bed and playing Final Fantasy Tactics for about 2 hours solid. I'd been neglecting that game recently, so now was as good of a time as any to catch up. I really love that game :) After this, I promptly took to the shower to get cleaned up for graduation.

I never liked events such as graduation. Too much attention. Some people would jump at the chance to get a little recognition. Not I. I grew upn in a social environment that had very little attention given to me...so naturally i'm accustom to lurking in the shadows. I love doing the behind-the-scenes work. I like to take a step back and admire what i've accomplished...i need no round of applause...i do that on my own. Nevertheless, I went through with the ceremony. It was as I expected...just a bunch of people talking, a brief moment of applause for each graduate, and then a small reception. Rather ho-hum to me. I let the pictures be taken...that, after all, was what my parents wanted most out of the ordeal. This was my last chance to please them in that regard. I doubt i'll be going back to any school programs like that again. Too much time :)

After grad, my friends decided to take me out for a late lunch/early dinner. This was probably the highlight of my day, with the exception of the event to follow. I had a pretty good time there. Just a few close friends and many laughs. Afterwards, we went to see the latest installment in the Star Trek movies: Star Trek (10): Nemesis. The graphics were everything I'd hoped for, and then some. The Trek folks never cease to amaze with their creative special effects. The plot was very similar to Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, in retrospect. But, that particular plot hadn't gone its course, so this incarnation was very welcomed. Excellent movie :)

When the movie ended, the few of us that were left drove to our favourite local pub and sat down for a beer. Or so we thought...2-3 busloads of people doing the famed '12 Bars of Christmas'. We got served once before the onslaught of the crowd. Needless to say, we didn;t drink more than one each. The number of people present was just staggering. After the drink, I proceeded home to get a good night's rest. I thought i deserved that on my birthday. The rest of my friends didn;t want me to go, but i was reeeeeeally tired.

So, when i got home, i spent the next hour lying in bed staring at the ceiling. And this, my readers, was my lowest point. I couldn;t stop thinking of how much better the whole experience would have been if I had that special someone around. I know what happens to others who have their someone...its a very emotional time. A time which I wish i could experience. Like i've said before, i have so much love to give...just no place to put it.

I hope next year's birthday goes better. I don;t think i can take too many of these.


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